Thursday, January 23, 2014

Week 17: Letting Go

I am finally learning to release the anxiety I have about my blood sugars. I am learning that anxiety does no one any good. Every time I have a high or a low one, I take the most reasonable course of action (correction, up or down), and then I wait. I don't immediately start changing my basal and bolus rates to prevent the problem in the future. I try to reflect on what I could have done differently. I observe whether it's a pattern over a few days, or just an isolated incident. And then I trust that whatever will be, will be...and know that the One who cares for us now will not abandon us in trouble. I pray almost every time I feel the anxiety creep up on me, and this has helped.

It is freeing to be able to approach the matter this way. It's still true that I will strive to spare nothing of myself. I will avoid eating those things which I have identified as problematic, and I will avoid eating at times when eating may be problematic, and I will push myself to go out on walks with the kids, and so forth. But I will not worry when all my best efforts fail me, or even at those times when I do fail to exert my best (God's mercy is great!). This way is best.